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A roommate story too strange to make up
So it's my fifth (and final) year of undrgrad and I am planning on getting my own place; but right before that happens I get an opportunity to rent a house for a total of $750 month, and this includes utilities. Well, no shit, I'm going to go for...
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The Incredibles Quotes

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Honey Best: Greater good? I am your wife! I'm the greatest *good* you are ever gonna get!

Violet Parr: We act normal Mom. I want to be normal! The only normal one is Jack-Jack, and he's not even toilet trained!

Syndrome: Oh, ho ho! You sly dog! You caught me monologuing!

Lucius Best: Superladies, they're always trying to tell you their secret identity. Think it'll strengthen the relationship, or something like that.

Dash: We're dead! We're dead! We survived but we're dead!

Lucius Best: I'd rather go bowling. Look, what if we actually did what our wives think we're doing, just to shake things up?

E: This is a hobo suit, darling. You can't be seen in this. I won't allow it.

Helen Parr: Stop it, both of you! We are not going to die! Now, you will both get a grip or so help me, I'll ground you for a month. Understand?

Helen Parr: I love you, but if we're going to make this work, you have to be more than Mr. Incredible.

Lucius Best: We look like bad guys. Incompetent bad guys!

E: I cut it a little roomy for the free movement; the fabric is comfortable for sensitive skin; it can also withstand a temperature of over 1000 degrees. Completely bulletproof; and machine washable, darling. That's a new feature.

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The Finer Points of Poverty
I'm poor. And I'm not ashamed of it. Actually, I'm kind of proud of myself for being poor. It's an accomplishment that many people will never attain. Some people will go through their whole life and never know what it's like to experience some of...
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Miss Congeniality Quotes
Miss Rhode Island: Once I stole a pair of red underwear from the department store. My mom wouldn't buy them for me. She said they were Satan's panties! Gracie Hart: You think I'm gorgeous. You want to kiss me. You want to hug me. You want to love...
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HOW D' YA LIKE THEM APPLES?
HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES? -- Or, things you might have said to Eve had she tricked you into eating the apple -- Copyright by Theolonius McTavish 2004. All rights reserved. There are a few things that you might be tempted to say, if you had the...
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No Stars for the Eclipse
One weathercaster called it a “must-see light and shadow show by the Old Master Himself,” but I can’t say this last solar eclipse was worthy of the recommendation. Not even total, and staged (in my location anyway) behind a thick cloud cover that...
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Emotional and Practical Efficiency.
"Life is about living with people, not counting the seconds". With a grin on your face and an open mind, consider the following efficiencies: Use one word where it is enough. Use two words where you wish to use twice as many. Find a friend who is...
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