Jerry: Coffee is a miraculous drink. Just think of the miraculous chain of events that had to take place to create this beverage. Somewhere, somebody had to figure out to take Coffee beans, burn them in a fire for several hours, grind up the remains and then run boiling water through them. Just think of it. Thousands of years ago in the Colombian mountains there must have been a massive volcanic eruption which burned million of acres of coffee beans. Then the massive earthquakes and fallout crushed the beans. After the eruption, it began to rain and water passed over the ashes. So, here you have it, a Colombian peasant, his family killed, his village destroyed, clamors up to the steaming hot river and takes a swig. Sure every possession he ever had is destroyed, but boy, he sure feels perky!
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This unaired Seinfeld script is an example of the comedic writing skills of Alex Reidiboim and Martin Winer
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