Home

Feature Article:

It’ll Feel Better When It Quits Hurting
Let me give you some advice putting together a swing set takes more then one person. That is unless you enjoy suffering aches and pains in muscles you did not even know you had. My wife told me to get some help but I assured her by the pictures in...
...Read More


EpicZone Archive:"I'm Heterosexual Where's My Parade?"

Additional Reading

This article was dug up from the EpicZone's Archive.I have only recently started putting my articles on goarticles.com,but felt that this being the most popular article on my site,could not be excluded from submissions.So,below is the full article in all it's glory.Enjoy.

----------------------------------

This rant happened to be inspired by two of the nastiest lesbians know to this world,thanks for making me throw up all over my great self…stupid fucking bitches.I should go out and beat the bitches down with my 5 Lb. cock right now.I know one thing,they wouldn't be gay when they saw how great my penis is.

Now back to what I was saying.I came out of school today,annoyed as I always am as I see the same old flock of morons that think it's a race to get on your fucking bus.For gods sake the bus leaves at the same fucking time whether you're the first on or not.Anyways,I go out and on the way BAM right in front of my great eyes was a sight so god awful I tried to make a picture of it on MS Paint and the program deleted its' self leaving a message of "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

I'll be honest,I'd rather do a picture album on tubgirl than to see those two lock lips one more time.I mean,I don't go around frenching bitches right in the middle of the public do I?Although I spend a lot of time running from ugly bitches I sure don't French the hot ones because I can never get enough public time.However these two lez-bos who have no friends and pretty much no purpose in life can do it and I can bet nothing would be done about it.Why you ask?Why in the hell would someone force this upon us?Simple,because they're gay.

I'm tired of people treating gays as if they are so special just because they can make out in the middle of public places.We know you're gay,the only way you could appear any gayer is if you're so ugly that no man would touch you,in other words,become Rosie O Donnell. I say in the record books the other day the worlds largest gay convention.What in the fuck is this?There's all of a sudden gay conventions,but we don't get straight conventions?Is that what you're trying to tell me?

It's not just that idea that pisses me off.I happened to go by the network Bravo,I threw up than too,and saw the show with the ass plugger fashion "experts".Ok,they're in love with the penis so that means they have a great fashion sense and everyone else is wrong.No wonder people find it so damn cool to wear pink and put they're collars up on their shirts.I have some bad news,you're all retards.I think that we should make a show called "Nothing but straight." That will involve all of the things that make being a guy so much fun.You know,drinking,porno,gambling,hookers,etc.The dress code would only have one rule…no pink.Other than that it'd be one huge party.Bring on the fat chicks…I mean…beer…and stuff.

Than once we gain so much popularity we'll get a loud mouthed representative to bitch and moan about other stuff that no one else cares about so the gays don't feel left out and than we'll have a huge parade with big floats honoring everything cool.Only the end of this parade involves me smashing a Rosie O Donnell piñata and talking about gayness being overpowered by greatness.My god I have so many great ideas.

About the Author

The Epic is owner of a personal site named the Epic Zone.You can access it by going to theepiczone.com.Use this link if you wish to use my article.Other contact is through e-mail at theepic@theepiczone.com

 

More Reading:


ITS ADDLEPATED APRIL AGAIN

The Finer Points of Poverty

Who Has The Greatest Job In The World

BY JOVE ITS JOLLY JUNE

CHRISTMAS CLANGERS

 
HAS AMERICA GONE TO THE DOGS

IS GOD A DEMOCRAT OR A REPUBLICAN AND OTHER CULTURAL ANOMALIES

TWITS TWERPS TWIZZLE STICKS

Quotes and Sayings Colloquialisms Part 2

SHAMELESS SANTA SLIDERS


IT'S ADDLEPATED APRIL AGAIN!
Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005. IT’S ADDLEPATED APRIL AGAIN! -- Or, time for feather-brained folk to have some fun! -- Compiled by Leady Beatrice Blitterlees and edited by Lord Earl Craboon April is one of those months that most pithy people...
...Read More

The Finer Points of Poverty
I'm poor. And I'm not ashamed of it. Actually, I'm kind of proud of myself for being poor. It's an accomplishment that many people will never attain. Some people will go through their whole life and never know what it's like to experience some of...
...Read More

Who Has The Greatest Job In The World?
I have, in my opinion, the world's perfect job. Just look at the evidence. I love people and I love God. I love talking to people about God and I love talking to God about people. Therefore, if you put these two together, I am doing what I love...
...Read More

BY JOVE IT'S JOLLY JUNE!
Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005 CALENDAR OF ODD EVENTS -- Eccentric events and odd occasions to celebrate in June 2005 – If June is “bust’n out all over”, you’re probably a green-thumb type, a frisky cowpoke, or perhaps just a “Hot Foot powder”...
...Read More

CHRISTMAS CLANGERS
CHRISTMAS CLANGERS -- Collected, compiled and cranked out by "The Quipping Queen" for your amusement and delight -- As the ho ho ho season rolls around, one is reminded of some very wicked words from a few wise men, a smattering of witty women,...
...Read More